On Lost Cultures—Report 197 A

Our scholars,
consulting records found
in sacred, climate-controlled vaults,
scribed in ink of varied colors
on scrolls of butchered tree flesh,
have determined that
the gods of this world’s men
(and anthropomorphic turtles)
responded only to
the heartfelt invocation,
“Cowabunga, Dude!”

Sacrifices of round,
well-segmented foodstuffs
were also strongly recommended.
See appendix b.

—Marcie Lynn Tentchoff